Packed In
(Post by skippy. Typos by alcohol.)
So as regular readers have already figured out, I have just moved from Illinois to Arizona, due to a really good job offer. The downside to all of this is shipping everything across the country on short notice, as well as prepping my house for sake. And naturally our movers got “unfortunately delayed”. Which I’m pretty sure is mover talk for, “Screw it, we’ve got all of your stuff, and you have to pay us to get it back, so well just show up whenever we feel like it. If this displeases you, please feel free to suck a bag of dicks.”
While I was at work today the movers finally did show up. I was pleased by this turn of events as I was tired of sleeping on an air mattress and using a card tbale as a computer desk.
On related note, my house in IL was significantly larger than the small place that I am renting now. Physics being the stone cold bitch that she is, this has caused a bit of a bottleneck in the unpacking department. This means my computer is now boxed in by some assembled shelving, a mattress and some sort of lamp/tree thing that I am not entirely sure that we started with.
In order to move the things blocking my computer, I’d have to clear out another area, and find a place for that stuff. Remember those sliding tile puzzles where you have to push the little squares around until the picture is assembled? That’s pretty much what I have going on right now. And since I had to work late tonight , I was way too tired to want to take part in a Tetris LARP.
All of this has been me taking the long way around to tell you that I had a funny story already prepared, and now I can’t get to it. I can however get to my laptop, and the six-pack of hard cider that my wife thoughtfully provided, so here I am just more or less typing whatever ideas pop into my head.
My wife pointed out to me the other day that due to our move we went from having Obama as our Senator to having McCain. I find that mildly amusing, and am pretty sure that makes me qualified to be on a news program as a talking head discussing the election. Although it would probably make me overqualified for Fox. (Quick aside: Does anybody find it funny that the single most xenophobic news network is owned by a foreigner?)
In fact, I have decided that living in both states during the election has uniquely qualified me to solve the current bailout issue. For some reason. Which I will do tomorrow once I am sober. At the present all of my economic stabilization ideas seem to involve high powered sniper rifles, cannibalism and clowns.
September 30th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Sniper rifles? Cannibalism?! CLOWNS?!?
I must know some of these ideas.
September 30th, 2008 at 5:16 pm
I don’t even need to hear the rest of it. Lead on and we’ll follow.
September 30th, 2008 at 5:33 pm
Sniper rifles, cannibalism and clowns? Wow… All we need is a permanent marker, two rubber bands and a tin can and we’d have a sloution to the national debt too!
September 30th, 2008 at 6:26 pm
Cannibalism sounds like a lovely way to solve both the economic crisis and worldwide food shortages while simultaneously preventing a re-occurrence. Can we start with President Bush?
September 30th, 2008 at 6:40 pm
Ewwww who would want to eat expired old meat off of Bush?
September 30th, 2008 at 7:18 pm
No plan involving clowns would be complete without clown porn.
September 30th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
a cannibalistic clown with a sniper rifle ha ha ha
September 30th, 2008 at 8:27 pm
“…as well as prepping my house for sake.”
“Post by skippy. Typos by alcohol.”
So I see. :)
September 30th, 2008 at 8:57 pm
I’m more curious about the Tetris LARP.
September 30th, 2008 at 8:59 pm
I would never eat Americans, we have too many chemicals and preservatives in our bodies, and I bet we taste like hot dogs and old pizza. Hmm… No Asians either, too much curry. ITALIANS! I love Italian food!
September 30th, 2008 at 10:13 pm
I wouldn’t think it’d be expired, what with all the chemicals he’s taken in over the years. I’d say he’d be more “pickled.” In formaldehyde.
September 30th, 2008 at 10:14 pm
Totally just found my halloween costume!
September 30th, 2008 at 10:53 pm
LARP (or LRP to us Brits) has its own Tetris variants. We have, Car Tetris for getting there; Tent Tetris for keeping kit dry when we get there, and managing to leave yourself somewhere to actually sleep; Car Tetris II for packing the stuff after time-out, and wondering how you could have eaten/drunk/lost so much kit and still ended up with so much that the passengers are loaded as part of the cargo; and finally Spare Room Tetris, where you try to stop swords/shields/arrows/chainmail and the rest taking over your house for the winter.
I’ve been at it for twenty years and I’m still crap. But, in my feeble defence, the difficulty level has been set at ‘Fiendish’.
T.
Captcha: was angel – now devil?
October 1st, 2008 at 1:23 am
I still belive that a full nuking of the entire planet would help as well. (either mircowave nuking or nuclear bomb nuking, both are fine with me.)
October 1st, 2008 at 1:25 am
That, and when you eat an Asian person, you’re hungry again an hour later.
Captcha: Reshaped Trenton
October 1st, 2008 at 4:09 am
Cannibalism and clowns? That’s creative. Most of my world solution ideas involve sniper rifles, explosives and forced Darwinism. Although one idea does involve saturation bombing with plum bobs.
October 1st, 2008 at 5:38 am
I’m really excited for the SGW server stress test tomorrow. congrats on the new job!
October 1st, 2008 at 9:38 am
I’ll be the one sitting on the sidelines with the popcorn.
Captcha: 246 competing = Why does that make me think of gladiators?
October 1st, 2008 at 7:34 pm
oh yuk! And you arn’t joking about the pickled ~ cemetaries are finding dead bodies just arn’t decomposing the way they used to thanks to all the presesrvatives & chemicals we eat. The idea of eating someone is just horrible, the additives! the preservatives! *shudder*
Clowns and sniper rifles I can see though….
October 1st, 2008 at 7:42 pm
I’ll bring the butter
October 2nd, 2008 at 1:17 am
No, you have not moved back to the darkside base in southern AZ where the greatest minds come up with the bestest ideas, have you? Say it isn’t so for the love of god man that place will shrivel your mind and testicles.
October 2nd, 2008 at 1:23 am
Why is everyone picking on us Eye-Tyes, oh well. As long as you’re not a clown, I hate clowns. And penguins (It’s a Catholic school thing, trust me on this)
October 2nd, 2008 at 1:40 am
I got the 12 pack and the Nutter Butters, maybe even some peanuts.
captcha = crashed contin = dented lincoln?
April 4th, 2011 at 1:17 am
Well, that would finally give the world a much needed check on human overpopulation. I still think that the better mean to that end is to bring back the dinosaurs.
April 4th, 2011 at 1:17 am
*groans audibly*
April 4th, 2011 at 1:21 am
I propose a better idea: Bob-ombs.
April 4th, 2011 at 11:33 pm
Amusingly, as of reading this post just now, I have decided to imagine Bob Lonsbury’s voice when I read your posts. (This is only because I have no idea what you really sound like and I had to improvise. It sort of beats reading it to my own voice as I usually do.)