Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

So today my wife woke up to a nasty bug on her birthday. A close friend of ours suggested medicinal hot toddies.

Our friend neglected to mention that hot toddies can have debilitating side effects.

Side effects include:

Wearing a pirate hat all day.

Getting stuck in the bathtub multiple times despite the fact that you never once set out to enter the bathtub in the first place.

Removing Christmas decorations with your whole body.

Loud descriptions of lesbian sex at inopportune moments.

Headbutting exercise equipment.

Mystery injuries to your hand that have probably have nothing to do with the fact that this is the second time your husband has had to haul you out of the bathtub.

Children using your unconscious body as playground equipment/musical instrument.

Pirate hats stuck in weird places.

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So I am going to ApolloCon 2014 in Houston next month.  I’ll be demoing and selling my game (Redshirts, for those who missed out on that.)

But the best part is that I get to go for free.  Because I am Skippy.  I don’t get it either, but if I can turn my name into free stuff, as well as a free chance to earn money I sure as heck ain’t gonna turn it down.

So some days it isn’t good to be me, but this isn’t one of them.

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Evidently some doctor I have never met has told my children that they are allergic to lima beans.

The same doctor also told them they needed to eat lots and lots of candy.  Sounds legit.

My daughter got a couple of shots, which she loudly did not approve of. When her brother was being prepped for his,  she marched up to the doctor, leaned into his face and said “Don’t. You. Hurt. My. Brother.”

Me to child: Hold your horses.

Child: I’m not holding horses daddy. I’m holding Chewbacca!

One day I was prepping to take my kids to the grocery store. I was informed with no small amount of gusto that everybody needed to wear superhero capes. So the three of us all put on capes, and headed out to do some shopping. I got a weird mixture of encouragement and evil looks. Strangely all of the evil looks came from mothers who were there with their own children. As I was wondering why, I heard a little girl say “Mommy, why can’t we do that.”

According to my daughter there are little people who live in my attic. They have told her that there is a birthday party with cake. And we should open up the attic and climb inside now. To ratchet up the creepy, she told me this in a whisper the day after I watched Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark.

Speaking of creepy, do you know how disturbing it looks when a toddler eats holes in a tortilla and wears it like a mask? Well I do.

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Video showing off my new game.
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Incredible music video from the gang that brought us Ren & Stimpy.

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Hooray! Time to get my nerd on.

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I’m Ihmhi, and I’m a Battered Gamer.

You know the whole “Battered Wife” stereotype… turn on Jerry Springer or Steve Wilkos and you have a 25% chance of seeing an overweight redneck woman saying “He still loves me!” or “He don’t know any better!”

I’ve been going through my game library lately, playing some games that have a lot of good things about them (“I still love them!”) but they have a lot of gleaming flaws (“They don’t know any better!”). These flaws can actually make the game painful or frustrating to play, and yet I still play them!

Sure, some games are minor offenders (Can’t remap controls in this day and age? What the HELL.), but some are pretty bad. I’m going to throw down a few of the more egregious examples, and I’d like to hear yours as well. As with some of my previous posts, this may read like an advertisement, but that’s just because I love gaming so much. (However, if any of the companies involved would like to give me a comically large wheelbarrow full of money to be a consultant, I am currently in the market for a new job…)

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Mildly NSFW.
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Today we salute you, anabolics Mr. Combat Reflective Belt Sash Wearer.

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OMG! she sings so good!

And the song is so good too!
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