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More of Skippy Sez

July 18th, 2013 by

Hi Everyone,

Here’s some more I’m bringing over from Skippy Sez. Since I’ll be posting here regularly instead, I’m going to eventually just shut that site down. At the least, redirect it over here.

Here’s more stuff my husband Skippy has said.

On My Disappointment Over Lack of Cheetos: “Yes, I realize that Goldfish crackers are Ghetto Cheetos.”

Postscript to an Insult: “Insult not valid in Alabama or Tennessee.”

“Helping” a Friend Get a Job:
Friend: I have a question to ask you: can you be serious?
Skippy: Ask me your question.
Friend: No that is the question, can you be serious?
Skippy: Yes.
Friend: Can I put you down as a personal reference?
Skippy: Yes.
Friend: Thank you. (Writes Skippy’s name and phone number on the application IN INK).
Skippy: Now of course I didn’t say I WOULD be serious when they CALLED me for the reference.
Friend: ….You are a terrible person.

On His Wife’s Facebook Activities: “Well, I just got checked into the hotel. And I see you’ve started a new religion.”

To The Talkative Wife, Late at Night: “You are totally not turning into a pumpkin. Pumpkins are quiet.”

Well, That’s One Way of Looking at It…:
Skippy and I discovered our toddler daughter gets angry when Ariel in The Little Mermaid turns human. She doesn’t like that part, and prefers we rewind the movie and just see the “big mermaid” part.

We were discussing possible concepts a person can take away from that movie.

Skippy says, “Personally, I came away with: French people torturing fish is comedy gold”.

Your Wife Is Not Rain Man aka Skippy Is Going to Hell:
Before you read further, especially if you are easily offended, remember: this site is our real life and nothing is off-limits. We are not always politically correct.

Today (well, that was dated 4/15/13), I received an official diagnosis of Asperger’s.

Skippy: “Does this mean I can’t do the Rain Man impersonation during sex?”

Me: “Not if you want to keep having sex.”

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3 Responses to “More of Skippy Sez”

  1. Shadowydreamer Says:

    Poor, abused, Skippy. So many of his questions end in a “Not if you want to keep having sex” :)


  2. Gary Says:

    Yes, Skippy is funny, but I think there’s something to be said for your presentation. Which makes it priceless.

    Thanks, Janice!


    Janice Schwarz reply on July 22nd, 2013 6:41 am:

    Thanks, I appreciate that! I don’t get to write on this site because I’m his wife. I’m getting to write because I’m finally learning to be funny on purpose, instead of by accident. :-D

    As my husband said in an earlier post: “You do kind of treat comedy the way Germans in the 30s treated everyone that wasn’t Germans in the early 30?s.” Yeah…it was that bad.

    Some time, I’ll have to write a bit about just *how bad* I have been at telling jokes in the past. And how I come by it honestly.


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