…Who Have Connections!
Believe it or not, the story still isn’t done. This is a continuation of the story Scott told me about the shoplifting airman from my previous two posts, “Shoplifters Are Bad” and “Especially From Navy Guys.” Now you can find out the rest. Trust me, the wait is worth it.
I left off on the old post with the foolish young USAF airman being “escorted” to the Air Force base nearby from the game store Scott runs. Scott swore up and down to me that what happened after he brought the kid back to his base rarely happens.
The police officer returned within an hour. In Charleston, it’s hard enough getting a cop to return a call within a few days, let alone physically in an hour. He comes up, ducks to get in, and then told Scott what the skinny was. “I just dropped the airman off at the base, and the impression I got was that they were just going to slap him on the wrists and let him go.”
“Well, that’s not acceptable.” was Scott’s reply.
The cop then responds, “You know, since all of this happened here, and technically the Air base is inside my patrol route, I could get the kid back.”
Scott told him that that was OK, he would just make some phone calls. And he did just that, once the cop gave his partings. He called up the First Sergeants on both sides of the runway at the air base, both of whom were good friends of Scott. One was a Chief Master Sergeant, and the other a Master Sergeant, E-9 and E-7, respectively. To say that they had some pull is like saying I am a nerd. Trust me on this one.
Anyhow Scott told them what the situation was, and they both assured him it would be taken care of. And it was. The airman got nothing but flak and crappy jobs.
On both sides of the runway.
“Got a backed up latrine? We have someone to take care of that.”
Then on the Air Traffic Control side, “Airplane’s porto needs emptying? We got someone for that.” Yeah, misery.
Anyhow, the officers eventually get wind of this, and they decide to step in. They noticed that the airman was getting crappy jobs left and right, and knew he pissed someone off, but not who. Either way, they decided to step in and have the kid transferred out for his physical and psychological well-being.
Who’s desk does a transfer order go across when it’s put in? That’s right, the first sergeant’s desk. The Chief knew what was going on, and figured he should let the transfer go through.
To Maxwell AFB, in Alaska.
Then he waited a week, called up Scott, and told him what happened. Scott said that the kid must have learned his lesson, to which the chief replied, “Oh, I’m not through, yet. I’ll call you back once I’m done.”
He then calls up the base in Alaska, and tells them who he is, asking to speak with his equivalent there. The transfer is put through, and he tells the First Sergeant in Alaska who he is, then proceeded to tell him about the airman.
“You should be getting a transfer from here in South Carolina. The reason why he was transferred is because he got caught stealing from a local game shop down here in Charleston, the Green Dragon –“
And he is cut off by these shocked words, “Wait a minute, he stole from Scott?” To say that the airman’s life was hell from then on out is an understatement.
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Tags: RivCA, shore stories
November 24th, 2009 at 1:03 am
What the hell? Does Scott know everyone, or something?
Captcha: $100,000 exerts — it sure does.
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November 24th, 2009 at 2:47 am
That’s…. freakin’ hilarious!
Is there more than one Maxwell AFB? The only one I know of is in Alabama… along with Air University and OTS. Alaska has Elmendorf and Eielson AFBs.
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RivCA reply on December 8th, 2009 2:55 pm:
To be honest, I wanted to put the name of the AFB in the story, since I couldn’t remember the name of the base off the top. A jump onto the main web page for the Air Force, one missed postal code later, and I’m the laughingstock of Skippy’s List.
Oops.
Oh well. The story is all true, regardless. Trust me, the AFB first sergeant would not send the dirtbag to the next state, but somewhere that guarantees misery.
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November 24th, 2009 at 5:14 am
It doesn’t really matter. Everyone I know that’s been stationed at Maxwell says it’s pretty crappy.
As for the assignment, I’m a little dubious since the First Sergeant doesn’t choose the assignment, the Air Force Personnel Center (AFPC) does. Now, the Shirt _is_ the guy who calls AFPC and requests the “hardship” post, and he could have put a bug in their ear about it.
Frankly, though, that’s some pretty shitty leadership if that dirt-bag airman was just going to get chewed out (a “slap on the wrist” in the Air Force’s book). Every Shirt and Commander I know of would have hit him with an Article 15 and an Unfavorable Information File (UIF) at a minimum, and if the kid was smart he’d have taken it and been happy (he could as for a Court Martial, but that’d be stupid). In case you think that to be a “slap on the wrist,” consider that he’ll be shit-listed by everyone in his chain of command. His next performance report will be terrible, which will push back his chances of becoming an NCO an average of 3 years. Furthermore, when it comes time to reenlist, he may be denied the chance. He’d also be on the kind of thin ice that would mean any screw-up in the next year would get him kicked out. And he’d have to work quite hard to keep the stink of that incident from sticking to him for the rest of his career.
We flyboys may be paper-pushers, but we take our paperwork seriously. :)
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Papasawn reply on December 24th, 2009 7:57 am:
I’m guessing “slap on the wrist” probably meant at least a letter of reprimand and a referral EPR. Yah gotta remember, in the AF, you don’t have to get an article 15 to get a referral EPR, and a referral EPR is pretty much a death knell for your long term career.
I don’t know many commanders who wouldn’t have given him AT LEAST an art 15 and a downgraded (if not referral) EPR.
Captcha – Special folks: the kind of people who steal whilst surrounded by upstanding military folk.
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November 24th, 2009 at 6:24 am
Nice. I approve.
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November 24th, 2009 at 11:59 am
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I love it!
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November 24th, 2009 at 2:58 pm
I hope whatever he was trying to shoplift was well worth putting his entire life and career on the line for. Otherwise, he becomes a perfect example of what never to do.
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November 25th, 2009 at 2:43 pm
AL, AK, so easy to mix up by the people who aren’t living in one of the above.
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Azz reply on November 25th, 2009 2:45 pm:
(Which was, of course, supposed to be in reply to Adam, but I managed to fumble the captcha and it lost the threading.)
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November 25th, 2009 at 5:51 pm
Wow, this Scott character seems to know everyone o_O
And LOL
And I think, Caine, in the first article he said this person was trying to steal a few hundred worth of comic books. I think. And I also think it wasn’t worth putting his career and life on the line for.
Captcha: Dahlberg rats
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December 7th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Maxwell AFB is not in Alaska.
Story immediately lost credibility with me on this single point. Until then it was a good read, and now I feel like the whole thing has been one long chain-yanking waste.
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Keilaron reply on December 7th, 2009 5:50 pm:
I’m thinking he read “AL” and interpreted it as “Alaska” instead of “Alabama”.
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RivCA reply on December 8th, 2009 2:58 pm:
That was the mistake. Wish I caught it before. Thanks for pointing put my stupidity.
Captcha: on almighty. Any atheists out there? I got one for ya’…
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