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They’re All Out To Get Me

June 28th, 2009 by skippy

First Ed McMahon.

Then Farrah Fawcett.

Then Michael Jackson.

Then Billy Mays.

Then the power supply on my computer.

Clearly there is some sort of conspiracy going on here.

I have currently locked myself in the bathroom with my laptop, and the Emergency Tinfoil.   I’m not coming out until I crack the code and I’m sure that it’s safe.  Or until my wife starts yelling at me.  Whichever comes first.

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29 Responses to “They’re All Out To Get Me”

  1. Stickfodder Says:

    Well good luck with that. [i]Telling is this just makes it easier to find you though.[/i] Wait what did I just say? I’m sure it was nothing.

    Reply

    Stickfodder reply on June 28th, 2009 10:13 pm:

    I hate when I forget that it’s html here and not bb. FUCK!

    Reply

  2. JoAnn Says:

    If you only have one bathroom in your home I can guarantee that the wife yelling will start sooner than the likelihood of your cracking the code…

    Reply

  3. LordEnigma Says:

    Dude! The power supply on my computer died last week! It was terrible :(

    Captcha: Lawrence peewee

    No thanks.

    Reply

  4. kat Says:

    At least someone in my family has a dead power supply about once every six months or so. But we also have five laptops (I’m the only one in the family who doesn’t have a laptop, even my eight year old sister has one). They are all PC’s and all my dad ever does is grumble about the general crappiness of PC’s but he’s never willing to spring for a mac like me.

    Reply

    SPC Hyle reply on June 29th, 2009 8:39 am:

    Why pay more for the same shittiness? Macs are artificially expensive because they refuse to allow others license to build components. It’s as monopolistic as they come. The OS isn’t any better than XP, and the lack of Mac viruses has more to do with their market share rather than security. Throw in the fact that you pay a premium for less power and functionality, unless you have very specific needs (which, by the way, is rapidly becoming much less of a reason to even consider a Mac, given software and hardware developers being competitive) you’re basically a marketing victim if you own a Mac.

    Reply

    Minty reply on June 29th, 2009 9:20 am:

    “Why pay more for the same shittiness?”

    Because it’s a fashion thing. And if I had a nickel for every time a mac user bitched at me about how annoying my PC was, well, I’d only have about 60 cents, but still. PCs really aren’t that hard to use, people! And to be honest, the only reason I don’t use a mac is because looking at the OS gives me a seizure. I have no idea why.

    Reply

    kat reply on June 29th, 2009 9:50 am:

    I kindof liked the fact that setting up my mac took all of five minutes, whereas setting up a PC takes a minimum of HOURS. Also since I’ve had the thing I havn’t had to defrag, virus-scan or scream in agonizing frustration. Everything works and works well, while the PC on the other side of the desk needs to be coaxed and gently eased into doing the least little task. I just got tired of it.
    Captcha: batsman outlets must be what they plug the bat-signal into

    Reply

    Shadowydreamer reply on June 29th, 2009 10:29 am:

    I did an upgrade from XP to Win7. Took 40 mins.
    The downgrade from Vista to XP took even less when I got the laptop in the first place.

    Don’t know why Bill Gates hates you, but he loves me fine :)

    Captcha : Amok Legislature .. So Captcha HAS been to Canada!

    SPC Hyle reply on June 29th, 2009 1:43 pm:

    I built my computer from components. It took me minutes to set it up, excluding the formatting of the hard drives, which took while given their size. This is because it is not hard.

    My laptops took minutes. Why? It’s not hard. If it takes more than 10 minutes, well, you’ve got a personal problem.

    StoneWolf reply on June 29th, 2009 10:53 am:

    You realize this is simply another variation on the Coke/Pepsi war. Macs and PCs are similar but optimized for different uses. So instead of getting all bent out of shape about how “cool”, “trendy”, or “counter-culture” Macs are, decide your needs and determine which will suite them best, PC or Mac, buy it and shut up. The only person who really cares about your system is you. You might as well argue which is better, FN FAL, G3 or M14.

    Reply

    Fiarr reply on June 29th, 2009 2:51 pm:

    Come on, don’t bother them. I enjoy the argument (since I know that PCs are clearly better).

    Captcha: bruising Decima – Younger cousin of Ebola.

    Reply

  5. steelcobra Says:

    Ouch. That’s the one part than can and will take everything with it.

    Reply

  6. Billy Says:

    Don’t forget Mr.LaFontain, the guy who did the movie theater narration. He died not long ago, so you may not want to forget him in your calculations for the code.

    Reply

    Ihmhi reply on June 29th, 2009 3:26 pm:

    Dude, Don LaFontaine died in September of LAST YEAR.

    Reply

    Billy reply on June 29th, 2009 3:36 pm:

    I forget, my sense of time died. Though, you have to admit, a lot of celebrities keep dieing lately.

    Reply

  7. TheShadowCat Says:

    If you are between your pregnant wife and the toilet, she won’t yell at you, she’ll be coming after you with something very sharp.

    Reply

    AnonyMouse reply on June 29th, 2009 7:41 pm:

    LMAO!!
    I cracked the Clue code-
    Skippy’s Wife with a Chainsaw in the Bathroom
    Captcha = Jacob borlau Skippy’s wife’s accomplice?

    Reply

    ShuttleZ reply on June 29th, 2009 8:14 pm:

    Rocket Propelled Chainsaw?

    On a side note, one thing I have discovered with pregnant women (with a sister, a sister-in-law and a cousin “up the duff”……and no, they’re not mine. I don’t live in Tasmania :-P ) is that when they have a “mood” even the smallest thing will annoy them……like breathing. You just can’t win. *sigh*

    Reply

    TheShadowCat reply on June 30th, 2009 7:50 am:

    Nope. Pregnant woman aren’t rational creatures, they’re hormonal and as such they should be treated with the utmost care.

    CAPTCHA – jovially 4:30 – something funny is going to happen at 4:30.

    StoneWolf reply on July 1st, 2009 6:30 am:

    It is safer handeling nuclear ordinace than pregnant women. Nukes are powerful but stable and you already know exactly what sets them off and can therefore not do it. You also already know all the potential hazards such as radiation poisoning and can take appropriate measures. Not so with preggers. And seeing you take countermeasures just pisses them off more and they find new and interesting ways to vent their frustration on you. My usual solution to Preggers or PMS is to grab my K-Pot and go hide in my foxhole in the backyard.

  8. Crucis Says:

    At least you still have your laptop. Mine died this morning with “Memory Parity Error.” What is worse, it’s in system memory. Replacing the memory card did not fix it!

    I don’t need a new laptop now…

    Reply

  9. MsHolly Says:

    To quote bash.org, and it is an older quote, no longer applicable, but those of us above twenty years old should get it…

    Name ONE thing that your windows comp can do that my MAC cant
    Right click.

    Reply

    steelcobra reply on June 29th, 2009 11:13 pm:

    Still comes with a shitty mouse standard. No clearly defined buttons + tiny ball that doesn’t work as well as a wheel is dumb. Plus wireless is wasteful unless it charges from a base station for a desktop.

    Dell Studio XPS models come with a free laser mouse almost as good as a Logitech nowadays. Obviously not with the features, but the quality’s up there.

    CAPTCHA: amoebas $118,055,000, that’s a lot of money for single-cell organisms…

    Reply

  10. ShuttleZ Says:

    WARNING – personal opinion ahead.

    Let me throw my 2c in. I have spent the last 16 years in the IT industry working my way up the food chain.

    I am currently the Systems Administrator and National Project Manager for an Australia wide beverages company that is looking to expand worldwide very shortly and I’m the poor sucker who has to make sure the IT can keep pace.

    My specialty is in Microsoft/Apple Systems integration being both a Microsoft Certified Professional in 2003/2008 and an Apple Certified System Administrator 10.5, having spent the last couple of years studying, certifying and re-certifying on top of my other industry qualifications.

    I’d like to believe that the people who know me are aware I do not base my analysis & recommendations on popularity or “coolness factor” but on their return of investment and the total cost of ownership of a COMPLETE package solution.

    So it’s with hand on heart that I loudly proclaim:

    In terms of initial Total Cost of Ownership – Wintel systems wins. BUT you WILL start replacing those systems within 3 to 5 years so as a Return of Investment? One BIG thumbs down.

    In terms of reliability and Return Of Investment? – Apple without a hesitation. yes, you do pay more initially but it will easily be 5-7 years plus before you even need to consider UPGRADING, let alone replacing systems.

    How is that for a Return of Investment. Almost 30% better than Wintel.

    Of course, this does depend on application but for most businesses, the above is true.

    Want an example? I have a customer who runs an international freight brokerage firm and in December on just updated from a pagemaker 4 database running on an old 1st gen iMac ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:IMac_Bondi_Blue.jpg ) that has not been turned off in 5 years. He just never saw the need to update. Ironically, it was a power surge not caught by an internationally recognised UPS that ended the CRT’s life but the logic board and hard drive where still running!

    Reply

  11. paula Says:

    And Gale Storm too: you forgot this ’50s actress who just died too!

    captcha: gibbing foil… I’m not sure what kind of foil THAT is

    Reply

  12. Maj Mac Says:

    Don’t forget David Carradine! You know it was murder and could be part of Skippy’s conspiracy. He wouldn’t be caught dead hanging himself in a closet with a cord tied to his wang! Wait. He was caught dead hanging himself in a closet with a cord tied to his wang. It was a very cleaver conspiracy!

    Reply

  13. CCO Says:

    At least with the power supply, your data is still intact, and power supplies aren’t usually expensive to replace (says the guy whose Mac certification expired yesterday).

    Reply

  14. Sam Cornett Says:

    Skippy,
    Sorry your power supply went out but at least you know that one of those isn’t out to get you.. Michael Jackson. Well maybe he will turn into a zombie and then we are all in for it.

    Sam

    Reply

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