Current Events
Once again I examine the issues happening today.
- Vermont Senator Leahy has introduced a bill to make it a Federal crime to sell fake maple syrup. Mrs Butterworth and Aunt Jemima last seen driving off a cliff in a 1966 Thunderbird.
- Republican Party is becoming too extreme, says noted sane moderate Pat Robertson. GOP seen slamming a Mountain Dew and snowboarding down a sky-scraper.
- FBI suspects Rep Murtha is corrupt. Investigation on the wetness of water still ongoing.
- Afghan President: I will back Pakistan if it goes to war with the US. Unless my regime is propped up entirely by the US military…you know what? Never mind.
- Hooray! We got rid of the illegal immigrants. Crap. We got rid of the illegal immigrants.
- Sure I kidnap and murder people, but at least I don’t read Twilight.
- Qaddafi died brutally at the hands of the people of the country he used to run. I hope he had the decency to not look surprised right before it happened. (Note: not linking the video on here, it’s as bad as you would expect)
- Keira Knightly does not let people spank her. That’s it. She’s off the list.
- Just in time for Halloween Facebook incorporates the New York Sex Offender Registry. Or as trick-or-treaters call it “The map to the really good candy.”
- “Oh crap, is it after midnight already?”
October 26th, 2011 at 12:48 pm
Air Force attacks Occupy Las Vegas with Icy B.M.
http://canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/41638
October 26th, 2011 at 1:22 pm
Re: #5- That’s called being hoisted on your own petard.
October 26th, 2011 at 3:58 pm
They were moved by the protestors’ cause.
October 26th, 2011 at 4:23 pm
Missed one, PETA is suing seaworld for slavery of the orcas they have.
October 28th, 2011 at 1:14 am
I thought you *had* to be kidding on #6. Just when I think I’m old and jaded and have heard/seen/read *everything*…
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