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on Thursday, September 30th, 2010 at 10:16 am and is filed under Fun with internets.
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News my ass. Nobody reports the news anymore. They report the “story”, because we’re all too retarded to take in raw facts, digest them, and come to our own conclusions.
And what’s with all the “human interest” shit? “News” is almost always about the doings of humans anyway, why do I need to here some oh so sad sob story? Maybe my heartstrings are just broken from constant tugging. Its like the last time I bothered to watch the Olympics. I want to know who won and who lost, not here some sob story about how little “Timmy” fought adversity in Africa to compete. Did Timmy win? Did his country win?
Its all farcical anyway. Even when they do report facts, they can scew it any way they want. Lets take any of the numerous battles between Israel and Palestine. Shots fired, depending on which side the news company is “pro” on, video of the other side shooting, then an imaged of a dead little girl. Do we know who shot her? Was she even killed in this battle? And all the newsies have to say was a battle took place and you’ll just assume that whoever they actually show shooting killed little Suzie.
Liberal, conservative, democrat, republican, they all play the same games with the news. The news service used to inform people and that was it, but they’ve all bowed down before the ratings god.
Wow. That’s the greatest video ever. My new favorite line is, “walking towards the camera like I’m in the f**king Matrix”. That dude is my new hero. That’s some funny shit.
Wow… From here on out I’m going to be thinking this as a parody for every news broadcast from here on out. Take that and supimpose the “Family Guy” Tom Tucker over the news anchor and you might actually have something worth watching.
Captcha: ovenen anxiety – I too get a little anxious when being threatened witha punishment of an “Ovenen”
September 30th, 2010 at 12:35 pm
Holy shit.
Every time I watch the news from now on I’ll be hearing this dude’s voice. Scary true.
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September 30th, 2010 at 3:20 pm
Wow. Just wow.
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September 30th, 2010 at 5:46 pm
This is C-N-N!
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October 1st, 2010 at 5:34 am
News my ass. Nobody reports the news anymore. They report the “story”, because we’re all too retarded to take in raw facts, digest them, and come to our own conclusions.
And what’s with all the “human interest” shit? “News” is almost always about the doings of humans anyway, why do I need to here some oh so sad sob story? Maybe my heartstrings are just broken from constant tugging. Its like the last time I bothered to watch the Olympics. I want to know who won and who lost, not here some sob story about how little “Timmy” fought adversity in Africa to compete. Did Timmy win? Did his country win?
Its all farcical anyway. Even when they do report facts, they can scew it any way they want. Lets take any of the numerous battles between Israel and Palestine. Shots fired, depending on which side the news company is “pro” on, video of the other side shooting, then an imaged of a dead little girl. Do we know who shot her? Was she even killed in this battle? And all the newsies have to say was a battle took place and you’ll just assume that whoever they actually show shooting killed little Suzie.
Liberal, conservative, democrat, republican, they all play the same games with the news. The news service used to inform people and that was it, but they’ve all bowed down before the ratings god.
Reply
October 1st, 2010 at 10:26 am
Here’s the equivalent for a scientific paper in the Guardian: This is a news website article about a scientific paper
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Ihmhi reply on October 2nd, 2010 11:17 am:
Argh, beat me to it.
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October 2nd, 2010 at 3:13 pm
I want more beheadings with lasers!!! And a laser for Christmas!
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October 6th, 2010 at 7:07 pm
Wow. That’s the greatest video ever. My new favorite line is, “walking towards the camera like I’m in the f**king Matrix”. That dude is my new hero. That’s some funny shit.
Reply
October 7th, 2010 at 2:40 pm
Wow… From here on out I’m going to be thinking this as a parody for every news broadcast from here on out. Take that and supimpose the “Family Guy” Tom Tucker over the news anchor and you might actually have something worth watching.
Captcha: ovenen anxiety – I too get a little anxious when being threatened witha punishment of an “Ovenen”
Reply