Canadian Army – Lessons Learned

A note from the author.

I teach Basic Military Qualification (Land) which is what they call the SQ (Soldier Qualification) these days. Basically it’s the course after basic training where a soldier learns actual army stuff, machine guns, M-72 section attacks winter survival, grenades etc. After the field training exercise #1 and #2 I get the candidates to fill out a few lines in a book I have started. The next course after them gets to read this book when they show up. The book is titled “Things I Learned the Hard Way in SQ/BMQ(L)”

(Submitted by Magerin Blakely)

1. Ensure your spare C9 (machine gun) barrel is tight on your back or you could be eating it during a section attack
2. Label kit with full last name or you will make the MBdr (me) very angry
3. Do not sleep in your trench, even if there’s no rain in the forecast. You _will_ wake up wet
4. Don’t pack counting on the weather being +30C all week with no rain because this is an army base and it could snow tomorrow.
5. Make sure you’re 100% sure who a person is before you say “f@(k man, get the f@(k outta my way” or it might be the platoon warrant officer
6. Don’t place your flashlight on the back of your tac-vest [in the field] (it will fall off)
7. Don’t leave PRETC (the last base they were at) labels on any of your kit for inspections
8. Don’t run in front of your fire team partner when taking the trench in section attacks, you will be a casualty and your section will have to carry you, this tends to make you unpopular
9. Yes, you will march everywhere
10. Always dig a lower part in your trench so it doesn’t become a swimming pool overnight
11. Para-flares are bright. Don’t look directly at the light.
12. Always be conscious of where or onto who your red hot spent casings are falling, i.e. your fire team partner
13. Never dig a trench between a perimeter of trees (roots)
14. IECS (winter) coats should not be worn during section attacks
15. Always pack your kit away when not in use
16. Always follow your fire team partner. Except when he’s falling down an embankment on a night recce!
17. NEVER wash your combats (uniform) with your C9 spare barrel bag. It’s lined with asbestos and feels like fibre glass.
18. All 2 Section (my section)- Learn to follow directions. Quickly.
19. Ten thousand changes to tac vest loading does not make it correct
20. Hand sanitizer in your left breast pocket will explode during weapons training
21. Do not get sick with gastro during N1H1 epidemic
22. Do not change the locker layouts
23. Do not anger the Master-Bombardier (me)
24. <Think> before you speak
25. ALWAYS look down the machine gun barrel when picking one up to put it on your gun
26. Master-Sgt does not a rank make (in the Canadian army)
27. Weekend Leave Passes are made of paper and photocopyable, nudge, nudge, wink, wink
28. If you think you know what’s going on wait 5 minutes and you will be lost again
29. Rucksacks can carry more than you can
30. Avoid falling into septic swamps on night recce patrols
31. Set a standard and then stick to it!
32. Watch for ranks and avoid using made up ranks
33. Never put your field hat down on the ground during a night recce, camouflage works
34. Sergeant-Bombardier is not a rank
35. If it looks like it might be a huge hole at night time it is one. Don’t step in it.
36. If everyone else in your section is putting on their knee pads, it is a good idea to use them too
37. Don’t shave your nuts right before you go to the field
38. Taking cold medication to help you sleep easier when you’re sick is not a good idea when you’re expecting stand-to’s
39. When you ask a staff member what time it is, it will always be the same… “Mark…Time!” ( a drill command to march in place )
40. Go get on the butt-out program for smoking, it helps
41. Get through SQ on the first try, not the 4th try it helps
42. The faster you get together as a team the faster you get weekends off
43. Be in good shape _before_ you get here
44. Bring ALL your kit on the joining instructions for course
45. Sometimes it’s good to just shut the hell up and do it.
46. Don’t get in a fight with your fire team partner
47. Never share a trench with 2 Ordinary Seamen (Navy Ptes) on Thursday
48. When the Sgt tells you the blue pen is green, the blue pen IS green!
49. When the Sgt tells you to throw the grenade in a higher arc, don’t throw it straight up in the air
50. Cam paint comes in more than one colour. The Ninja Turtle look is not effective cam
51. Never leave your hoochie right when an arty sim is going off, you will lose your legs
52. When an arty sim is going off GET ON THE GROUND!
53. Eat lots of food [before the FTX]. Weighing as much as a 12 year old girl makes things more difficult
54. When you are course senior, ensure that the shower room is ass-lint free prior to the platoon warrant’s inspection
55. The grenade container is not a salt shaker, you will get peppered if you’re not careful
56. Throwing grenades like an 80 year old woman makes sergeant mad

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This entry was posted on Sunday, August 30th, 2009 at 7:59 pm and is filed under New List. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.