The Educational Gangs of New York
See if you follow my thought process here:
Sesame Street teaches us that in New York there is an ethnic enclave of puppets, similar to Little Italy or China Town.
History teaches us that ethnic enclaves such as this are usually the result of a large influx of immigrants from the same place, in a relatively short period of time.
History also teaches us that when this happens the new immigrant is frequently marginalized by society at large. Which can result in the first several generations getting heavily represented in crime and vice.
All of this means at some point in New York’s past, puppets controlled the drug and prostitution rings. Gangs of tiny fuzzy miscreants meted out violent street justice to their enemies, and did battle in the dim alleys.
Corroborating evidence: Gordon, from Sesame Street, was once a pimp. Which would explain how he has been able to spend all of his time hanging out in a cul-de-sac for the past forty-two years without any visible means on employment.
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July 6th, 2011 at 1:35 pm
And now we are going to have a few people who are going to be thinking of muppet prostitutes at all of the wrong moments.
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Squab reply on July 6th, 2011 2:40 pm:
You say that as though there is a RIGHT moment to think of Muppet prostitutes.
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Psychlycan reply on July 6th, 2011 2:48 pm:
Well…
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Wetdryvac reply on July 6th, 2011 5:36 pm:
Well, that would explain why Letterman and Rubber Ducky scared me silly as a kid.
July 6th, 2011 at 10:11 pm
I believe a documentary has been done on the history of Muppet Town. It goes by the name of Avenue Q
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July 8th, 2011 at 5:28 pm
Now all I can imagine is Elmo screaming “WARRRRRRRIORRRRSS…..COME OUT AND PLAAYAYAYAYYYY”
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jmireles reply on July 8th, 2011 10:30 pm:
Wow. I had wondered when someone was gonna make reference to that rather terrible classic…
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July 9th, 2011 at 8:29 pm
I’m never gonna look at Kermit and Miss Piggy the same way I used to do again. *shudders*
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July 15th, 2011 at 12:10 am
It’s the closest I could find to a pimp hat.
http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Kermit_the_Frog's_Alternate_Identities
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