Walk It Off
Being deployed for over six months is way too long. Being deployed for over six months in 130 degree, symptoms | dry heat with no running water, is fucking criminal and should only happen to murderers and rapists. And when I say that, I’m talking about people who have committed BOTH murder and rape, not just one or the other.
Having been in these horrendous conditions for so long, you can imagine how excited I was to see rain for the first time. I look outside, and see that it is raining pretty hard, so I think to myself, “I haven’t had a good shower in a long time”. So I grab my soap, and I run outside bare-assed and jump up on top of one of my tanks. The rain is pouring down on me, and I’m soaping up and just loving every minute of this “natural” cleansing process.
I so wish the story ended there. So I get my entire body all lathered up, and I’m ready to just let the rain hit me and wash it all away. Instead, right at the moment, the rain stops abruptly. So here I am, standing on top of my tank, butt-naked with soap all over my body. I had to jump down off of the tank, walk back into the building, and up to my room in those exact conditions. I guess this has brought a brand new meaning to the phrase, “Walk of Shame”.
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October 7th, 2008 at 12:50 pm
How is it that the soap didn’t wash off during the lathering?
Captcha- Maud soweth
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October 7th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
Ouch.
Nasty.
Well, at least you are ‘partially’ clean, from the lathering, you’ll just smella little … odd.
*sniffs* Hey, who forgot to wipe?
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October 7th, 2008 at 6:28 pm
My dad was a 19K. I’ve come to the conclusion that tankers just might be crazier than Marines. And that they’re my favorite people in the world. They’re the best people to convoy with. They’ve always got a way to make hot cocoa on board, on high idle they can melt the grill off a police car, and they put a roll of toilet paper on the nose of a heat round to make a flaming tail at the range. Being allowed to be an armor crewman is one of the very few things that make me wish I weren’t a girl.
captcha: 120 intensity- the level of craziness inside an Abrams with the hatches closed, on a scale of 1-100?
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October 9th, 2008 at 10:05 pm
Had a friend do that during an FTX at Polk…exactly the same thing happened. Only difference was Jeff screamed “WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, MAKE LEMONADE” as he ran from tree to tree, shaking them vigorously so he could get the soap off.
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November 27th, 2008 at 10:27 pm
AND NOBODY SAW YOU?!?
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April 5th, 2011 at 9:24 pm
That sucks. As one of my brother’s former gym (?) teachers would say, “That’s crap, man, that’s crap!”
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