An Actual Conversation
In which I vastly improve a famous movie and book franchise.
Skippy: You know what would make the Harry Potter franchise awesome?
Wife: No idea. What?
Skippy: KISS.
Wife: Kissing? They already have that…
Skippy: No, KISS, all caps. The metal band.
Wife: You mean like on the soundtrack?
Skippy: No, although a Quidditch team taking to field to “Detroit Rock City” would be pretty bad-ass. I mean like, if the members of KISS were running Hogwarts.
Wife: ….?
Skippy: There are four members of the band, so each one could be in charge of a different house. And all of the robes could be replaced by leather, with chrome spikes.
Wife: …ok…
Skippy: Just imagine Dumbledore with the Starchild makeup, wearing black armor, throwing up the metal horns, while getting some Gene Simmons tongue action going.
Wife: No. No I’m not going to imagine that.
Skippy: And then Snape could be all “Your metal is weak Mr Potter” and-
Wife: Lalalalala! I can’t hear you! I can’t hear you! Stop ruining Harry Potter for me!
Skippy: You’re totally going to imagine the Dumbledore thing the whole time when the next movie comes out, aren’t you?
Wife: Shut up.
Follow
October 1st, 2010 at 6:35 pm
Wow! You have made Potter bearable.
Reply
October 2nd, 2010 at 1:21 am
I wanna Wingardium all night!
And Leviosa all day!
Reply
October 2nd, 2010 at 4:02 am
Poor Hufflepuff, they’re gonna end up with
Peter Criss.
Reply
October 2nd, 2010 at 8:27 am
Been skipping your meds again, Skippy?
Reply
TheShadowCat reply on October 2nd, 2010 10:12 pm:
LOL! I’m thinking he just likes sleeping on the couch.
Reply
October 2nd, 2010 at 11:02 am
Would the Death Eaters be the “Lick It Up” era KISS, then? Y’know, when they lose the makeup, their credibility and their popularity? Or would that be more GWAR?
Also, GWAR in Harry Potter would be infinitely badass.
Reply
October 2nd, 2010 at 3:15 pm
Skippy, it must be ***interesting*** to be married to you.
Reply
ShuttleZ reply on October 2nd, 2010 7:11 pm:
Well, it certainly is ***interesting*** in his life!
Reply
October 3rd, 2010 at 7:09 pm
I’m too young to remember KISS but I know who they are and the Dumbledore is going to haunt my brain forever and bring back memories of that awful fanfic My Immortal.
Reply
Captain McCheese reply on October 3rd, 2010 7:11 pm:
Dumbledore image.
Reply
October 3rd, 2010 at 8:18 pm
IRON MAIDEN would be WAAAAAAY more epic dont you think im too young to have listened to them but i love em side effoct of my dad being a metal head
Reply
October 4th, 2010 at 5:21 pm
No, this doesn’t go far enough! Each of the Houses needs its own House (of Hair) Metal Band.
Nominations are now open to match a band with each House.
Reply
David B reply on March 2nd, 2014 12:34 pm:
Black Sabbath with Gryffindor, Nickelback with Slytherin because they both suck, and I have no idea for the other two
Reply
October 7th, 2010 at 4:23 pm
I nominate Slayer for Slytherin.
Reply
September 14th, 2014 at 10:59 am
You have made Harry Potter sound interesting. Wow
Reply