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Defensive Driving

February 23rd, 2011 by skippy

I am taking an online defensive driving course. I signed up for a comedy defensive driving course. Because, as the advertisement said, why not have a good laugh while spending six hours of my life being educated about proper driving habits.

Well it turns out that the people who write the advertisements for comedy defensive driving schools are FILTHY FUCKING LIARS!

It’s as if someone decided that reading the jokes on the side of a happy meal package made him a stand up comic. And then, unfortunately, nobody beat him to death.

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9 Responses to “Defensive Driving”

  1. SPC Hyle Says:

    Your pain must be great. You have my sympathy.

    Reply

  2. kat Says:

    huh, defensive driving doesn’t really strike me as something you should be learning online. I’m all for online classes, but some things are, I think, still best learned hands-on.
    For example, if any nurse ever tells me that she got her nursing degree online from U of Phoenix, I’m getting up and walking out.

    Reply

    TX Detritus reply on February 24th, 2011 4:07 am:

    At least within the state of texas the terms/ phrases “defensive driving” and “hands on” are in no way, shape, or form, connected to each other. Defensive Driving is simply a way to either A)Get a reduction on your auto insurance rate, or B)[and most commonly] keep your insurance rate from going UP in the wake of a speeding or similar traffic ticket.

    Content and length of the course are mandated, you can typically do it one of two ways, in a “classroom setting” I.E. in the “large party room” of a Golden Corral/Ryans or similar, being read the course content by the likes of a failed stand-up comic, or artist/writer “waiting to be discovered”. sometimes held over two consecutive nights to get in teh required “class time”

    Or you can do it on-line, in the comfort of your own home, at an almost self-paced rate, and skip the torture of having to listen to the aforementioned waste of space.

    Back when there was still a “Stand-up Defensive driving” course offered in my community, I met several folks who admitted they paid for the course TWICE, once for the classroom version, and a second time for the on-line version just so they wouldn’t have to endure a second day/hour of some “comic sans comedy”

    Reply

  3. Catbunny Says:

    Huh.
    I had to take a defensive driving course once.
    The teacher pretty much encouraged us to draft semis.
    But made sure to tell us to give motorcyclists a wide traveling distance.
    (Things with much more mass than your car take longer to stop. Things with much less mass can stop MUCH faster.)
    Don’t remember much else about the class. :)

    Reply

  4. Michele Says:

    I agree one should avoid advertising non-serious ads for defensive driving courses

    android spy software

    Reply

  5. Sarah G. Says:

    I’ve taken one online that was unintentionally hilarious. At one point it seemed to be on the verge of dissolving into p0rn when it described the car as a “steel stallion.”

    Reply

    Matt reply on February 25th, 2011 5:28 pm:

    I think “stell stallion” was my drivers-ed teachers name. She was very creepy…

    Reply

  6. AFP Says:

    I took a standup comedian defensive driving course, and the dude was hilarious. Guess at least one of them had to be.

    Reply

  7. Speed Says:

    I prefer offensive driving. Hopefully it’s not as bad as a military driving class.

    Reply

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