Archive for December, 2009

The title pretty much says it all.
(more…)

So here’s what happened to me today.

Last night, my wife went out to diner with her brother, while I stayed home with the kids. Around the time I was expecting her to come home, I get a phone call.

It was my wife informing me that the ignition in our car is stuck. Specifically that the key could not turn. After years of reliable service the lock just decided that it didn’t like her key anymore. She could turn the car on with the remote start. But she couldn’t get it out of park without using the key.

(more…)

But you have always been at war with Eastasia.

I wonder if you will be able to see my website any more?

I was running early this morning. I hate running early, because it means that i could have been sleeping, but instead for some ungodly reason I woke up the first time my alarm rang. God bless the snooze button!

(more…)

But totally not in a gay way.

(more…)

(Submitted by Speed)

A few years back I worked at a help desk for gas station point of sales equipment. That’s fancy talk for cash registers. Later on we supported touch screen computers and fancy-dancy gas pumps with computer chips in them that “talked” to the store’s main computer through a binary to TCP/IP converter, and the breakdown-daily-car-wash-box. Here’s a quick list of what I couldn’t do there:

1. Not allowed to enter the building on time, must be early and on the phone at the “start time.”

2. When a mad customer says, “I’ll have your job!” not allowed to reply, “You wouldn’t like it, every asshole in the world yells at you.”

(more…)