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Archive for November 24th, 2009

Bohemian Muppetry

Tuesday, November 24th, 2009

Thanks to Lorna for sending this in to me.


…Who Have Connections!

Tuesday, November 24th, 2009

Believe it or not, the story still isn’t done. This is a continuation of the story Scott told me about the shoplifting airman from my previous two posts, “Shoplifters Are Bad” and “Especially From Navy Guys.” Now you can find out the rest. Trust me, the wait is worth it.

I left off on the old post with the foolish young USAF airman being “escorted” to the Air Force base nearby from the game store Scott runs.  Scott swore up and down to me that what happened after he brought the kid back to his base rarely happens.

The police officer returned within an hour. In Charleston, it’s hard enough getting a cop to return a call within a few days, let alone physically in an hour. He comes up, ducks to get in, and then told Scott what the skinny was. “I just dropped the airman off at the base, and the impression I got was that they were just going to slap him on the wrists and let him go.”

“Well, that’s not acceptable.” was Scott’s reply.

The cop then responds, “You know, since all of this happened here, and technically the Air base is inside my patrol route, I could get the kid back.”

Scott told him that that was OK, he would just make some phone calls. And he did just that, once the cop gave his partings. He called up the First Sergeants on both sides of the runway at the air base, both of whom were good friends of Scott. One was a Chief Master Sergeant, and the other a Master Sergeant, E-9 and E-7, respectively. To say that they had some pull is like saying I am a nerd. Trust me on this one.

Anyhow Scott told them what the situation was, and they both assured him it would be taken care of. And it was. The airman got nothing but flak and crappy jobs.

On both sides of the runway.

“Got a backed up latrine? We have someone to take care of that.”

Then on the Air Traffic Control side, “Airplane’s porto needs emptying? We got someone for that.” Yeah, misery.

Anyhow, the officers eventually get wind of this, and they decide to step in. They noticed that the airman was getting crappy jobs left and right, and knew he pissed someone off, but not who. Either way, they decided to step in and have the kid transferred out for his physical and psychological well-being.

Who’s desk does a transfer order go across when it’s put in? That’s right, the first sergeant’s desk. The Chief knew what was going on, and figured he should let the transfer go through.

To Maxwell AFB, in Alaska.

Then he waited a week, called up Scott, and told him what happened. Scott said that the kid must have learned his lesson, to which the chief replied, “Oh, I’m not through, yet. I’ll call you back once I’m done.”

He then calls up the base in Alaska, and tells them who he is, asking to speak with his equivalent there. The transfer is put through, and he tells the First Sergeant in Alaska who he is, then proceeded to tell him about the airman.

“You should be getting a transfer from here in South Carolina. The reason why he was transferred is because he got caught stealing from a local game shop down here in Charleston, the Green Dragon –”

And he is cut off by these shocked words, “Wait a minute, he stole from Scott?” To say that the airman’s life was hell from then on out is an understatement.