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Archive for November 4th, 2008

Pre-Election Result Thoughts Regarding “Dubya”

Tuesday, November 4th, 2008

Regardless of who is elected, (I think we all know who will win), I think about 70% of us can agree, that it will be a good thing to finally be rid of President George W. Bush.

On behalf of that 70% of Americans, and a large portion of the people of planet Earth, I would like to say the following to George.

Don’t let the door hit you in the ass.

I know you don’t understand why I do not appreciate your efforts to make sure Americans do not live in peace and prosperity, considering how much effort you have put into making sure that we won’t for quite some time.

Just sit back, and go on vacation in Crawford for the next two months, (it’s not like you haven’t spent more time on vacation than any other President in history), and try not to screw anything else up.

You may think I am mad about things like invading a country that had nothing to do with 9/11, or not capturing Osama Bin Laden. Maybe you think I am mad about your administration eroding our civil liberties. Maybe you think it is all the lies and secrecy of your administration.

Maybe you think it is because of your response to hurricane Katrina. You did lose a major port city on your watch. I know you did not create hurricane Katrina, but your response was a little lacking. But then again, you did need to prioritize the many responsibilities on your agenda and figured that going to John McCains birthday was more important than taking care of New Orleans after a disaster.

Maybe you think I am upset over the largest expansion of the Federal government since the New Deal, or the massive budget surplus that you turned into the largest budget deficit in U.S. history. Maybe you think it is because our economy is in the tank, and gas prices have skyrocketed. Maybe you think it is the high unemployment, and the housing crisis.

I must admit, I am not pleased with you and your administration over all of the above mentioned issues.

No, my biggest reason that I disapprove of you and your administration is that as a Texan, I have never been so embarrased to say I am from Texas as I have been these last eight years. There used to be a time that it was cool to be from Texas. Thanks for ruining that for me.

Fortunately, I haven’t traveled to other countries, but if I did, I would be embarrassed to say I was an American as well. Thanks for ruining that for me too. At least I could save some face by telling people in those countries that I never voted for you, not even as Governor of Texas.

And since we are on the Texas thing, what the hell is up with your accent? I have never heard anyone with your accent. I can usually tell what region of Texas a person is from by the accent. Is it a combo of North Texas and Kennebunkport? East Texas and Martha’s Vineyard? I can’t tell.

So, in summary, I would like to express my feelings by quoting your eloquent, Vice President, Dick Cheney, “Go f**k yourself.”

P.S. Don’t mess with Texas.