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I’m Divorced

September 24th, 2008 by LT Ronald

Bitch cheated on me while I was deployed. It sucks, but oh well, life goes on. It’s been two years now. I have a beautiful girlfriend, who, if she signs the pre-nup will become my beautiful fiance. (Screw me once shame on you, screw me twice shame on me).

If there is two things that my cheating succubus gave me, aside from less than savory credit and an ample distrust of the opposite sex, is two wonderful precocious children. About 8 months after the split I was enjoying some quality time with my children at a waterpark. While on the lazy river with my 6 year old daughter, two beautiful young women engaged me in conversation.

My daughter, who wasn’t completely cool with dad talking to pretty young women, decided to have her say and made a sassy comment to one of the women. I just shook my head and said “she’s just like her mother.” My daughter quickly corrected me with: “DAD, I am not just like mom, I’m not tired of putting up with your crap yet.”

 

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17 Responses to “I’m Divorced”

  1. Bane Says:

    lmfao
    just wait till she’s a teenager…

    Reply

  2. Minty Says:

    DAMN.

    Reply

    PFC Barry reply on September 24th, 2008 9:25 pm:

    nuff said

    Reply

  3. Stickfodder Says:

    You’re no the only soldier going through that kinda shit. My cousin Mike’s wife was cheating on him and spending all of his money while he was in Iraq. The worst part is how he learned she was cheating on him. He was on the phone talking to his son and his son said that some guy(he mentioned the guy by name but I don’t know what it was) was taking them to some amusement park, Mike asked who the guy was and his son said that it was mommies boyfriend. Ouch. Not the kind of thing you want to hear when in Iraq.

    He has since met and married a better women, and he’s also got two step son’s now.

    Reply

  4. A B Says:

    Hahaha! Burn!

    Reply

  5. kereineko Says:

    Thats sad that your ex-wife is saying things like that in front of the children. Growing up I was one of the kids and didn’t realise everything that was coming from my mom was so warped. I only ever wished my Dad was around a hell of a lot more but how could he with the hell spawn of a mother I have. We are working on that now and doing good… I wish you the best of luck!

    Reply

  6. TheShadowCat Says:

    You’re doomed. Be glad she lives with her mother.

    Reply

  7. GunRunner Says:

    That shit be in female DNA…no other explanation.

    Reply

    Minty reply on September 25th, 2008 12:03 am:

    Hey, now. I’m female, and I never said anything like that to my father when my parents divorced. Of course, my mother never aired her grievances to us kids.

    Reply

  8. Dave in NC Says:

    Kids — so adorable you could just choke ’em.

    Reply

  9. Sean Says:

    The good thing about the lazy river is that you can leave the body and they’ll just float…long enough for you get away, that is.

    Reply

  10. Fairest of All Says:

    Well dear we should talk. by the way my older son is a cadet at Georgia Military College. Sargent Major Hill says you owe him Bullrawng for talking ugly about Georgia girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As a matter of fact I did put him up to it. Alumni weekend is next week.You should show your face. They knocked down Old barracks and Vincent hall this week. They are giving away the bricks.

    Reply

    Lt Ronald reply on October 18th, 2008 5:22 am:

    How about that? You can tell STAFF SERGEANT Hill (he is a GMC CSM) that I still remember pulling out the uniform regulation and showing him how he was impersonating a Sergeant Major by continuing to wear his 25th ID patch on his left shoulder (his last active duty unit) and CSM rank on his lapels, when he retired a Staff Sergeant, E-6. He stopped wearing BDUs altogether after that one. During my commisioning he wore his Class A dress uniform with the same wrong configuration of rank and unit patch! I was done and didn’t feel like being petty, but if he says that I owe him bullring than he owes me bullring for continuing to impersonate an E-9. He and I never saw eye to eye. I stayed in those old barracks, they didn’t have the new ones up yet. It is my ten year anniversary of my graduation, and as much as I wish that I could make it down, my responsibilities keep me in PA. I loved Georgia girls, quite a few of them actually. I would really like to have one of those bricks. That took me back, thanks.

    Reply

  11. Fairest of All Says:

    vincent hall brick secured

    Reply

  12. Suomynona Says:

    Haha! She sounds almost EXACTLY like my 6 year old cousin. You got a handful there.

    Reply

  13. DocSlushie Says:

    come down to medical and we’ll give you some ointment for that burn LT….

    Reply

  14. David B Says:

    Kids say the darnedest things, eh? What did the two women do after she said that?

    Reply

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