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Archive for February 14th, 2008

This counts as romantic in my house.

Thursday, February 14th, 2008

Recently me and my wife were watching the Farscape series on DVD. One of the main characters went through a period where an evil alien had taken partial possession of his brain. This would manifest itself through bouts of crazy and irrational behavior. At one point when the evil alien’s forces were closing in on the good guys, the brain control made the hero try to surrender. His girlfriend realized what was going on, and rescued him. By hitting him in the head with her gun until he went unconscious.

Upon seeing this my wife turns to me, and sweetly informs me that if an alien presence ever took over my mind, that she would knock me out with a gun to save me.

I have a few problems with this. Firstly, we do in fact have a gun present in this house. A very large semi-automatic shotgun. So she has the tools at hand to carry out this idea.

Problem number two. My wife can be a bit “enthusiastic” at times.

The third issue is my belief that my wife will take a rather liberal definition of “alien presence takes control”.

“Hey! You’re looking at our waitress instead of me! Clearly some sort of alien mind-control is at work!” Bonk.

“The toilet seat is up! This smacks of alien trickery!” Smack.

“My husband would never lay on the ground having a seizure brought on by severe skull trauma! Release him you impostor!” Clobber.

So I’ve taken to hiding the gun, and wearing my Romance Helmet around the house.