This story comes courtesy of one of my co-workers, Dav. I know it looks like a name from Invader Zim, but it’s pronounced “Dave”.
One of the things that me and Dav have in common is our ethnicity. Both of us are non-practicing Jews. Being Jewish comes with some advantages that gentiles don’t understand. One is a to have practically a supernatural affinity for the entertainment industry and money management. Another is the built in camouflage/amusement factor.
Like any other minority in the country, there are people that don’t like Jews. But unlike many other minorities, Jews are not color coded. If someone starts insulting Blacks in front of a black man, he is starting a fight. But if someone starts insulting Jews in front of me, they probably don’t realize I’m Jewish and are about to be embarrassed. Which is, of course, highly amusing.
Dav got to meet his girlfriend’s extended family during a big Easter Dinner last year. His girlfriend came from a large family of Eastern European immigrants. He hit it off and was fairly pleased that he seemed to be making a good impression with them. The grandmother served them lamb, which she explained was the traditional Easter meal for people from Bulgaria.
“We always have lamb for Easter. It’s the only time we can afford it. It’s not like we’re Jews.”
Dav looked uncomfortable for a moment and his girlfriend quickly intervened.
“Grandma, Dav is Jewish.”
Grandma quickly tried to make amends.
“Oh my god! I’m so sorry! I didn’t think to look at his nose!”
Now every time he sees her family he complains about how long the meetings with the Elders of Zion take and most of them seriously have no idea if he’s joking or not.
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